I've been with my partner for 9 years and I think he wastes his time. Sometimes I regret that I met him or that he is like that. He likes to play on the Playstation, PC, mobile and if he still had a console he would play with it.
His day goes by: getting up, going to work, coming home, gambling into the night, sleeping. At the weekend, if we do nothing, he can gamble for up to 10 hours at a time. When I tell him to please turn it off, he also does that with a "What do you want?!" or "What else should I do?!" and immediately pulls out his phone to watch videos on Facebook or any series.
Before that, he was not so addicted because we mostly worked. If we're with his colleagues, then he gets out of a time his cell phone out and I then have to entertain these people, although I do not work with them.
To be honest, I have tried everything with him. When we go out, he always asks, "Where are we going, what are we going to do there again, are you done?"
He is definitely addicted to gambling or is this a media addiction?
That is very possible. "What should I do otherwise?!" is an indicator of that.
He definitely has to go to therapy, because I sometimes feel alone now, even though he lives in the house.
Well, that's just the question of whether he is right and you would otherwise do anything really
If he does not play and then you sit silently and bored on the sofa… Hm…
I like to do something, but he just does not like anything. He hates it completely and prefers to watch videos or something has to be sitting there.
That says a lot. You should not feel alone in a relationship. It is often difficult to persuade people (therapy). Based on your description, I would state that there's no problem in his world at all.
You should not bend your friend in your favor, either you realize that he is developing social or personal deficits, I would think to look for a new partner, maybe it is also a hobby like any other, in which of course you have fun and love to spend the entire time.
Then he just seems to be lazy?
Is the question if you fit together?
What if you do something, alone?
Yes, but then you can't make friends? My day of the week is only 1 hour in the morning and when we sleep. Because he comes to sleep at 2am. In the evening he plays with a headset and does not even hear when I call him.
I do that very often.
My advice: Give him the chance to get better with therapy if you still love him. If he refuses you should look for someone you can be proud of.
You probably live together. I also had such a friend who sat for hours on the PC and did not want to do anything with me.
I would talk to him again and make a compromise with him. Tell him you find that too much. If nothing changes then you have to take the consequences. How else is it in your relationship? Do you still love him?
Honestly, if someone wants to talk me out of my hobby, I would finish on the spot. But of course I understand your concerns, so tell him you're very dissatisfied and he should change something, set a deadline for him to stay in a hotel or visit a friend, but if he's going to get out of addiction, help him with everything. It is important to move back to him only after the complete therapy, otherwise he will easily relapse. Importantly, if he is gambling in a healthy setting, everything is fine.
Does that bother him? Does it disturb you?
Yes we live together and it has just become so blatant. He is constantly watching videos or gambling. These are his only occupations and I hardly see him, because we work from 09:00 to 19:00. He does not have dinner anymore, because he's in a campaign right now.
No he thinks that's really good when I'm gone, because then he can gamble all the time.
Then he definitely does not want to change anything… Then the question is if you want to feel the relationship so on or if you go your own way
As I said, would be looking for him again with the conversation in peace. Ask what's more important to him. His stupid games / videos or some time with you. He does not have to give it up completely, but reducing would be a start.
Then you should do something without him.
