Relatives gossip about me what to do?

My relatives are our neighbors and live next to us. We have a terrace and a thin partition in between and you can hear everything. I had argued with this family for 7 years and for years I have ignored them, except for their son, my couseng. My couseng plays PlayStation every night and he argued with my uncle and I heard my name. He said to his father I'm so lazy and stupid and have achieved nothing in life like my couseng? So he meant me. That was downright blasphemous. I told my mother and she's angry now and wants to talk to mother. The thing is icj doesn't want there to be arguments again after years. My mother told me she could say that she heard it, I didn't. I said no and told her not to argue about me. We as a family never had the best relationship with them anyway. I told my mother that I blocked my couseng everywhere and would ignore him. If one day he speaks to me about it, I will tell him brutally in the face. My mother says I'm scared. No, I don't, but I don't want her entire family to quarrel and I had quarrels with them for years and now also with my couseng. At some point you realize that discussing with people like that doesn't help. What should I do? Listen to my mother? I'm 22 years old and my couseng around 17

They took you as a bad example for your son.

How about if you take that as an incentive and make something of yourself?

So we have someone in the family who is just lying on his family's pockets and his own family is still defending him. But we then also openly say that he should do something and just stop gambling because it can't go on like this. Do you go to work or still to school, or are you unemployed and just sitting around at home? If it is the latter, they are right, even if they say it behind your back. If not, then I can fully understand you. However, I would ask them quite neutrally what they meant when they talked about you and how they came up with it. One should be able to talk to one another in the family. If you are not, you are NOT a family.

Personally, I wouldn't avoid arguments just for the sake of calm. Obviously there's something in the air, I wouldn't feel good to pretend I don't know anything.

But to be honest, I can also understand the view of wanting to leave it that way. You now have the knowledge what he thinks of you. As you said yourself, you can tell him that to his face at any time.

What do you mean by that? I never did anything bad. Worked next to school and never at home. I don't sit down and play the playstation until 3 a.m. Never did anything criminal and was too good-natured to people. My father has a disability and I kind of had to take on his role. Nobody from this family trusted me with a driver's license or anything else.

I won't leave it. I'm waiting for the right time so that I can say it in front of his face

So my relatives argue with my couseng because he just gambles all night, yesterday he and his father, they can't get him off of it. He's out all night and always have to call him to find him.Yes, I once dropped out of an apprenticeship due to psychic problems and concentration disorders, but I always worked alongside school and studying until night as a part-time job. I gave my parents monthly money. Got my driver's license and my high school diploma, even if I got stuck. I've done a lot for my parents. Above all, I had to take on the role of father because my father has a physical disability. My uncle says I'm not capable of anything in terms of handicrafts or cars. I didn't have a father who could show me that, I had to teach myself everything. I even paid a lot for the renovation of our toilet and that voluntarily. They judge because they have no control over their own son

And start a new training soon. And no, you can't talk to the family because they generally blaspheme and even used my sister as a bad example because she had a secret boyfriend when she was 16

Yes, I find that understandable.

Even if that doesn't really go with the fact that you don't want another family fight, does it?

I don't want a fight with the family yeah. Because it doesn't work and I have no more strength. But I'll ignore him and as soon as he speaks to me he'll know it himself