I'm not doing well at all. I just feel unloved by my boyfriend. We hardly have sex. Every 2 months. He never kisses me but just fusses and he never said I love you either. He really gives me little affection. I'm just missing something. In any case, we see each other very often, but I'm mostly ajar in the bedroom with a door and he's in the living room and playing ps4 or on the cell phone. Today he sent me home and said we should take a break today. In any case, I was at home and there's a jam right now because I'm fat and my parents can't cope with it. I've put on a lot of weight and my parents say I would always get fatter and chop on it and hurt me. I know that's bad but it's hard for me to lose weight. So back to the actual topic. I argued with my sister because she thinks I'm fat and all. I then called my friend and told him that I couldn't be at home all weekend. He wants to do something with his mum at the weekend and then I said cool then I do something with a friend. Then I called today and wanted to know which day he wanted to do something with his mum and stuff. Then he just said I was too clingy and should do it on the day I feel like it and then you might not see each other on weekends. Then I called again later because of the argument with my sister and told him on the phone that that's why I don't want to be home at the weekend. In any case, he thought he felt like he was playing children's market with me and he didn't feel like it and it wouldn't be good for a long time. In any case, I feel like he doesn't care. I'm thinking about going into hiding for a few days from now and sleeping elsewhere (not with parents and not with him) and making a cell phone that he might be worried about: but somehow he doesn't care too. What should I do?
Definitely talk to him that you are missing that. And if he doesn't take it seriously, take a moment to immerse yourself or withdraw. First, to see how far you are from him and second, so that he knows how he is when he can't have you around.
Maybe you will also notice in time that you will be better off without him, then take the consequences.
He knows what I'm missing. He himself has problems that he can't give it all, he said. I do not know what to do. If he says with the statement, I will do it for a long time / it is no longer going well, does he mean that he separates from me? Do you think going into hiding would be good? Consider doing it from today.
No problems are solved by running away. But these are only resolved if you talk to each other about it. Ask him what is wrong. That you are unhappy and what he imagines in a relationship. Because you rely on each other and you are there for each other with problems.
I don't think submerging is a good idea. In the worst case, your family will report you to the police as missing and you shouldn't do these worries to anyone.
There are also milder forms… You could just write less to your friend, take care of yourself more. That seems to him to be right anyway and maybe he will miss you soon. If you are always available for him and looking for contact with him, he has no way of missing you.
I don't think it's nice when your family chops on you because of the weight. If you don't feel so comfortable yourself, you could start a dance class or something similar. Several flies with one stone: You do something for your body, your family has less to complain about and your friend sees that you can keep yourself busy - and if that is also fun and good for you, that would be perfect.
When everyone is grumbling about you, sometimes the best solution is not to work on the relationship with the people, but on who you are the most important person for you, you will be dealing with you the longest in your life. Do something good for yourself, free yourself a little from the others. When you exude satisfaction, it often comes back to you.
Yes, just stay away a few days and try to come to yourself. Then you may also find that you are getting out of your glue precisely because you are eating bacon.
You not only feel yourself, no you are disregarded in your relationship. Because a friend who only gambles instead of often nibbling on you, is either not interested in you or he gets his sex elsewhere: from other girls or on the Internet.
It just makes you unhappy and your body stops responding by looking for substitute satisfaction - and if it's in the form of chocolate. Your family will of course also notice this, but it obviously does not notice that you are doing badly.
Stand on your own feet and do something for yourself!
I don't think that bothers him if I don't answer. He then thinks, ok then don't stop "and waits until I get back in touch. I still remember When we weren't together, I didn't get in touch for three days to see if he cared about it. Then I had him for three days later asked about it, because nothing came from him at the time. Then he only said then that he thought I just wanted to be quiet.
Separate yourself from it. Immersion doesn't solve problems… Live your own life
What would you do well now? Can you do something good for yourself that is not dependent on other people?
Yes, stop running after him, you also have your pride. And you only notice what you have when you lose. I didn't ignore anything for your boyfriend for a few days that they still report as missing🤔.
And now take care of yourself and clarify the matter with your family, it is not that that bullies you
You know, I think it's too hard, you said to him on the phone that I can't stay at home and I want to sleep in the car. I said that I would look for a place for it. I know it wasn't right but I was so desperate. He didn't have anything more to say about it or is worried that I'm sleeping alone in the forest somewhere or something
I would like to write in more detail with you, but I don't know if this is possible, so I'll give you a few tips:
- just contact him every two days, simply reduce the frequency of your messages in the long term → maybe something will come from him
- free yourself a little from the people around you, be completely normal and kind to everyone, but take care of yourself more inside
- you have something good: take a bath, listen to music, watch a movie
- try something new: a dance class, yoga, meditation, reading
- build a strong and good relationship with yourself
and only then will the others come!
You're just thinking about what he might be thinking and doing. Take care of yourself!
Okay, you're in your room, it's relatively late anyway, but you could still do a little something for yourself. Do you like listening to music (not sad!), Painting nails? Tidy up a bit and let music play, write a list of things you could do for yourself in the near future! Can you think of anything you can do to help yourself a bit?
