Actually, last year it was planned that we would move in together as I had to move due to my studies. He wanted to go along, but screwed it up because he didn't have any money. Or I wanted him to show me beforehand that he could also earn money before I was left alone with the costs. In the end, after graduating, he sat at home for almost a year and did nothing but play computer games, watch videos and start streaming himself.
The topic of "computers" has been pretty present since the beginning and well - it annoys me.
I know it's a hobby, like playing soccer, etc., but even as a soccer player you don't just do that all day. After getting up he sits in front of the computer and hangs out on Discord all day and / or streams or plays along his people.
Which is not a problem in itself, but we have a long-distance relationship because of my move and he hardly ever inquires. Says that he has nothing to say because he doesn't do anything all day and he doesn't want to talk to me about irrelevant topics on the phone.
He's also annoyed with everything. We used to rarely have sex because I had bad experiences in early childhood and couldn't get over it for a very long time. Because I live alone, I inevitably had to deal with my problems. Of course, it's not just out of the way now, but - in my opinion - it shouldn't hinder us anymore. The only stupid thing is that he used to complain that we didn't have enough sex and now that I can "offer" him more, he's also annoyed because it's too much.
Even when I wanted to start playing (his favorite game) myself so that I could still spend time with him over the great distance, he liked it at the beginning, but after a short time he just stopped playing the game and himself Looking for a new game.
And now I'm reaching my limits. He hangs on the computer all day and complains on the phone that I don't want to hang up yet because I want to spend time with him somehow… For example, I was with him on a weekend and wanted to leave on Sunday, but then I did did not drive because I just found the time with him so nice and otherwise immediately miss him again. He was also happy, but was also annoyed because he had an appointment to play at 5 p.m. He was on time in front of the computer and would have been ready to gamble, even though I was still there. Sure, that was very spontaneous, but I would leave everything where it is, especially if it is only about a game. He's hanging out with the guy online for most of his week and yet he still wanted to hear from me first, "No, spend the time with me, please".
For him there's simply nothing else. I'm somewhere behind his online people, Twitch and co…
Do I still fit into his life?
If you want me to answer directly, no you don't. It seems to be an addiction for him and can be blinded because he doesn't offer you any disclosure or the like.
Short and sweet. Give him a choice. You or the games. Finished.
You should talk to each other about your problems. Someone online can judge the situation worse than you - you mainly talk about the bad things.
Personally, based on what you wrote, I would give him an ultimatum - to get a job. If he's done that, he'll be lucky enough to get rid of it.
Apart from that, however, I personally see an addiction from this that is not so easy to deal with and would ask myself whether you are so compatible with each other.
Talk to him about it. That you worry, that you feel lonely and that you feel like you are not in a relationship at all.
That would be my suggestion.
